Fields of Gold
by soho178
Summary: Nick meets his true love.


**_Fields of Gold _**

_G. Sumner_

_You'll remember me when the west wind moves  
Upon the fields of barley  
You'll forget the sun in his jealous sky  
As we walk in the fields of gold _

So she took her love  
For to gaze awhile  
Upon the fields of barley  
In his arms she fell as her hair came down  
Among the fields of gold

Sophie Winchester, what do you think you're doing!" The ladder rocked precariously and Nick reached up to steady her as she reached for a final apple or two. He lowered her to the ground taking the basket that hung on the lowest branch.

"They looked so lovely Nick, I just had to have them!" She smiled up at him and his breath caught in his throat. "Do you always rescue damsels in distress?" Her green eyes sparkled as she teased. "I didn't know they had knights in shining armour in the Wild West!"

He grinned and put on his best Western drawl. "Just cowboy manners, M'am. My Mother would take the wooden spoon to me if she thought I'd let a lady fall on her…."

Sophie's mouth opened in feigned outrage. "I was not going to fall on… anywhere!"

"Anything you say Milady." He swept off his hat and made an exaggerated bow in front of her.

"Oh you! Are all cowboys so cheeky?"

Nick's eyes twinkled and he chuckled. "Well, Mother would probably say I'm worse than most."

"Walk with me?" She took the basket of apples from him and left them in the shade. They strolled arm in arm out of the small orchard and past the barns paddocks that housed the riding stock that was the reason for this trip.

James and Maddy Winchester watched from the family home, unsure of how they felt about the romance between the handsome, rugged cowboy from America and their daughter. They wanted her happiness of course, but this was a love that could take her far away, to the other side of the world.

Nick stopped to take in the view from the rise behind the house. Set out in front of him was one of the prettiest farms he'd seen on his buying trip. It wasn't just that the buildings were well kept and the farm orderly, though it was true. No, this place had an air of belonging about it, like the fields and buildings had come to a comfortable fit after years of familiarity.

"This is my favorite spot." She leaned against him and gazed over the fields of lush green barley touched with the summer sun. The wind sent ripples of color chasing each other across the fields as they stood and watched. They felt at home in each other's arms, a feeling like none he'd ever known.

"Heath likes a spot on the North Ridge about a mile from the house. It faces east so he'll get up at to watch the sunrise." He'd been pleased at her acceptance when he'd told her about his younger brother, about his heritage and their closeness. The English aristocracy, she'd explained, had long ago reconciled itself to the existence of illegitimate children and many had risen to greatness, their birth not withstanding.

"And you go with him?"

"Some mornings. He's a private man, but he shares it with me. It's a glorious sight."

She knew he loved the land, you could hear it whenever he talked about the ranch his father had built. It was bittersweet, He would never live anywhere else, his soul belonged to a valley in California, outside a town she'd never even heard of until her father had told her of the American rancher's upcoming visit.

When he arrived at the Winchester farm he was tired and ready to leave for home. The finest bloodlines in England didn't make up for being away from family and friends for so long. He worried about the ranch and felt guilty leaving Heath with so much to handle on his own. Not that Heath had objected, if anything he'd pushed Nick into taking the trip.

Three months before, Nick had been excited about seeing Great Britain and maybe taking a trip to the Continent as well as looking at breeding stock. The Barkley name stood for quality even in Europe, so he'd been welcomed into the homes of many of the top breeders in England and Ireland. They'd ranged from grand mansions to smaller but still wealthy manor houses. The one thing they'd all had in common, though, was a formality that had worn on him after so long.

When Nick had arrived at Far Coombes the warmth of its owners was a balm to his weariness. John and Maddy welcomed him into their home with an open, honest affection that he'd missed and he felt the loosening of strain that had become second nature after so many weeks. John had picked him up at the small country station, driving the trap himself. That alone warmed his spirits and by the time they'd ridden the 30 minutes to the farm Nick knew he'd found a friend in the quiet, down-to-earth breeder.

"You have the look of a man who loves the land, Nick."

They were walking behind the barns, looking over the green fields stretching out in front of them.

"No place I'd rather be than on the ranch, John." Tired as he was, his guard was down and it was easy to hear the note of longing in his voice.

"So tell me, which is prettier? That sprawling ranch of yours or these old hills and fields?"

"John, that's like asking a lonely man which of two women is more beautiful. If he's smart he'll tell you they both are beautiful in their own way." Nick grinned and was rewarded with a chuckle and a clap on the shoulder from the older man.

"It's been a long trip for you, eh?"

"That it has."

"Well, you feel free to stay as long or short as you like."

Three days into his stay, on the eve of his departure, what he'd written off as travel fatigue turned serious. Nick tried to pretend he wasn't ill, fearful of missing his connections to Bristol. The headache and malaise of the last few days grew worse and his temperature rose. By the end of the day he was coughing and in pain, suffering the onset of Typhoid Fever.

Maddy glared at the doctor, wearing the stubborn look he knew so well. "You will NOT be sending him to the hospital in London! You may as well shoot him right now!" Most people who went into one didn't come out again.

"Maddy, it's Typhoid! For God's sake woman, haven't you suffered enough at its hand?" Richard Stone had seen the family through the epidemic two years before, when John and Sophie had survived the disease but Robert, the only son, hadn't been so lucky.

"I'll be doctoring him myself. My God Richard! The poor man is half a world way from home and you'd send him to live or die in one of those hellholes! I'll not have it. If it had been Robbie's fate to be so, I'd feel better knowing he was cared for with a mother's love." The tears pricked her eyes, but she stayed defiant despite the quiver in her chin.

"John…"

The taciturn farmer shook his head. "I agree with her Richard. He's a fine young man and he deserves better than that."

"You know I'll have to report this?" He looked at the two challenging them to disagree.

"We know, and we'd appreciate it if you'd tell Mr. Ackers to leave the weekly order of groceries at the farm gate. One of us will pick it up after he's left."

The doctor left the house shaking his head and muttering about the streak of stubbornness that seemed to run in the Winchesters.

Maddy settled Nick into a bedroom that overlooked the stables and sent John off to London to wire his family.

Nick protested, "Maddy, you should have let them send me to the hospital. This is too dangerous." Nick's head hurt and he grabbed at his ribs as a dry unproductive cough rattled his frame.

She smiled at him and shook her head, wiping his fevered forehead with a cool damp cloth. For a minute she reminded him so much of Victoria Barkley that he was almost in tears. His family crowded into his thoughts as she busied herself wringing the cloth, giving him time. He wanted so desperately to be with them again. He was afraid of dying here, even with these kind people. He had so much still to tell them all. "Easy there Nicholas, you just rest. We've a long road ahead of us but I intend to see you through."

It was a long four weeks. They took turns nursing him while the hired men took care of the stock and the crops. No one wanted to risk any more illness. The farm was quarantined and the Winchesters took it upon themselves to quarantine the house itself.

Through the long days and nights of sickness he'd wake to see their kindly faces and hear the soothing words that were whispered in his ear. Sophie and Maddy read to him when he was up to it. Sophie had seen him pick a volume of Tennyson from her father's bookshelves and it was that she read to him when he was aware enough to listen.

At the times when the disease eased its grip for a few hours, he told her about the ranch, about the towering Sierra Nevadas that dominated the skyline and the rich fertile fields of the Central Valley. He told her about his family and how they had come to settle the land and build an empire. In his words she learned about his love for the father he had lost and the mother who had inspired him by her courage. She could hear the deep love he held for his siblings, Jarrod who was his rock, Heath his partner, Audra his joy and Eugene his constant worry. By the time the disease finally ran its course she had come to feel she knew his home and family almost as well as he did.

For his part, Nick found comfort in talking about them. He was afraid he would die and he wanted someone to be able to tell his family they had been always in his thoughts. It was during those long hours of off and on conversation that Sophie Winchester fell in love with the sensitive dark cowboy.

They almost lost him in the third week. John saw the determination in Maddy's face and the haunted look in her eyes and wondered if their act of kindness had been a mistake. This was when Robbie had finally succumbed. The delirium had set in and his bowels had turned to water. John had tied him to the bed as he ranted and raved one minute and cried out for his family the next. As they watched Nick sink into the same morass, all three prayed that this time another family wouldn't have to live through the loss of a beloved son and brother. When his doubts rose up he reminded himself of his wife's words. At least Robbie had died at home, among those he loved. No, it would never do for any man he counted as friend to pass alone and uncared for when it was in his power to do otherwise.

It was no doubt that Nick was well-loved. John had stayed to wait for a reply and it had come within a day.

_John Winchester, Regency Hotel, London, England_

_Spare no cost, no effort for Nick, our family incomplete without him. Bless you for your kindness. Letter to follow. Send news. Victoria Barkley. Barkley Ranch, Stockton California, USA_

Again John made the padded ropes should they need to bind him to the bed. Maddy tended him like a baby, soothing his tormented mind and cleaning the mess his body expelled, burning the sheets afterwards. He'd lost weight throughout, but now his body wouldn't keep anything in it and it was all they could do to get water in him. As his fever climbed higher and higher all three feared that they would also lose this battle.

Finally, one blessed night the fever broke and Nick sweated and shook with chills as his body expelled the toxins that had built up in his blood and bowels. By morning he was cool, drained, and weak as a kitten.

Sophie had been there to unbind his wrists and ankles once the delirium had passed. It had given her such great pleasure to do it this time. She stroked the limp hand and placed a gentle kiss upon the palm. "You rest now Nick Barkley, rest and grow strong."

"Ummmm" he started to come to and Sophie went to the door to call her mother.

"Hold still Nick, let me get you some water." She poured a small glass and slipped her arm under his head to lift it. "Small sips now, slowly."

"Well isn't it nice to see you back with us, Nicholas!" Maddy came to sit on the on bed beside her daughter and helped with the water. His eyes only reflected confusion. "You sleep now, it will be better the next time you wake up."

He slept the clock round, only waking when they roused him to drink. In those first few days he drifted in a haze of exhaustion and weakness. It was three more weeks before the quarantine was lifted, the risk of spreading the deadly disease over. By then Nick was on his feet and walking out with Sophie daily. The day they could travel from the farm safely John left for London to wire the good news, penned by Nick himself. Later that day in Stockton, the immaculately dressed Jarrod Barkley rode his horse hell bent for leather into the main yard, a sight his middle brother would have laughed to see. The grateful family a half a world away relaxed for the first time in weeks.

_Mother. Worst is over. Tired and weak, need time. Will sail back in four weeks. Miss you all so very much. Love to all. Nick_

For so few words it spoke volumes.

Nick and Sophie spent most of their time together. She took him to walk in the fields with her, enjoying an unusually warm and sunny English summer.

"If I didn't know better I'd think the California sun has come to take you home!" He smiled at her as they lay in the grass just over the rise, out of sight of the house. He ran his hands through her golden hair and curled it around his fingers. The fields that stretched before them were no longer green, but the burnished gold of ripe grain waiting to be harvested. The wind whipped across them sending up a murmuring sound.

"Do you hear them whispering to you? They say you can hear the voices of your loved ones on the wind. Do you hear your family, Nick?"

He gazed at her, lying there, with the sun beating down and thought that there had never been a more beautiful woman. Bending down, he planted a tentative kiss on her lips, watching and waiting for an answer to his unspoken question. She smiled and he bent down again, this time kissing her with more passion.

She reached up and placed a small hand on the back of his neck pulling him in closer. They settled into each other's arms and Nick tasted the sweetness of her mouth for the first time. The kiss left them both breathless, His desire stirred and he tentatively reached to caress her breast. Their kisses grew deeper as both their bodies responded to the sensations coursing through them.

As the time to leave grew closer their time together was bittersweet. Her carefree laugh and impish wit beguiled him. Her smile sent waves of joy through his heart. His body longed for her in a way that he had never known and his heart broke. He had found someone he could spend the rest of his life loving but he couldn't imagine asking her to leave this place that held so much of her family's history. Nor could he ask her to leave her parents alone without family to care for them in the years to come. As for him, he thought about staying with her, but they both knew that his soul belonged on the land that his father had died to win.

It was a glorious day, white clouds in a sapphire blue sky, the sun shone down on her father's fields, ready for harvest.

"Oh Nick, I'll miss you so! I wish you didn't have to go." She leaned her head against his chest and tried to commit every bit of him to memory. His arm encircled her waist drawing her closer.

"What am I going to do without you?" Her tears fell unashamed and he leaned his head down to plant a kiss on her lips. He'd been asking himself the same question.

The night before he left, John and Maddy asked the young people into the Parlor and sat them down.

"Nick, you'll be leaving tomorrow. We want you to know what a joy it's been to get to know you. You'll always be welcome here."

Embarrassed, unaccustomed to such a direct statement of feelings, he stumbled through his own thoughts, hoping that they would understand what his clumsy speech could never convey. "John, Maddy. I owe you so much….my life, my family's happiness. You didn't have to take the care of me like you did and I want you to know that if you ever need anything, if it's in my power, I'll do it for you."

Maddy smiled at him and placed a fond kiss on his cheek. "Nicholas, there's no thanks or debts among family. No one will ever replace our Robbie, but you've come to feel like a son to us."

John looked at Maddy with a glint in his eye and she nodded. "Well, there is one thing you might do for us."

"What's that?"

"We were fancying buying a farm…..in Stockton, and we hoped you'd be willing to find one for us. A good place for breeding horses." Nick's eyes widened as he realized what they were telling him.

"Come John, I think these two would like some time alone. They have some talking to do." Maddy stood on tip toes to place a gentle kiss on the tall cowboy's cheek, then they strolled from the room leaving Nick and Sophie by the fire.

"Soph…."

"Yes Nick. Yes."

When the moment of parting finally came they walked out to the rise for one more private moment.

"Travel safely my love. I'll miss you every second we're apart." She snuggled into his chest as they looked out over the fields where the harvest was beginning.

"Listen for me calling to you in the wind Sophie Winchester. I'll be here whenever you want to hear my voice."

* * *

_Will you stay with me, will you be my love  
Among the fields of barley  
We'll forget the sun in his jealous sky  
As we lie in the fields of gold _

See the west wind move like a lover so  
Upon the fields of barley  
Feel her body rise when you kiss her mouth  
Among the fields of gold

Nick stood slightly apart from his family waiting for the train to pull in. After ten months apart he wanted nothing more than to hold Sophie in his arms again, to hear her laugh and see that intoxicating smile of hers, to kiss her sweet lips and feel the quickening in his blood that her presence stirred in him. He wondered now if she would still feel the same. His deepest fear was that the time apart would have changed her feelings. But if that was so, why would she have come? Their letters had passed back and forth weekly and Nick knew that if anything he was more deeply in love with her than he'd been before.

Heath and Jarrod had watched their normally self-confident brother retreat into a brooding quiet. Both had tried to reassure him as the day drew nearer.

"Brother Nick, she wouldn't come out of a sense of obligation." Jarrod handed him a whiskey as the settled in front of the fire.

"How do you know that Pappy?"

"Nick…" Heath placed a reassuring hand on his shoulder, "You wouldn't give your heart to someone who didn't live by hers." Both brothers had smiled at him then and Nick had felt calmed.

The distant whistle signaled the arrival and everyone's excitement rose. Heath looked over at Nick and wished he could do something to ease his doubts. The train pulled in and passengers debarked. Nick scanned the platform looking for the familiar blond hair. John and Maddy held back, letting Sophie step down first. When he saw her, Nick's face lit up with such joy as his family had never seen before. He was past them, the two wrapping arms around each other, speechless in their embrace.

Grinning and shaking his head, Jarrod stepped forward to help down the woman who was an older version of her daughter. "Mrs. Winchester? I'm Jarrod Barkley. Let me help you." He handed her down and the two stepped aside to let John join them.

The rest of the family made their way over and Heath dropped a hand on his brother's shoulder. "Nick, I hate to interrupt, but dontcha think you ought to introduce us?"

Blushing, he pulled away, "Ummm, sorry folks." He kept a possessive arm wrapped around Sophie's back.

The next weeks were busy, filled with moving John and Maddy onto their farm and finalizing wedding arrangements. Sophie and Maddy had brought their gowns with them and only needed a local seamstress to make any final adjustments. John was fitted for a tuxedo in San Francisco after a weekend of business and sightseeing with both families in attendance.

Victoria and Maddy had corresponded over the months, growing familiar and fond of one another. It was only in person that Victoria thought she could express her deep appreciation for all they'd done.

"Nick looks so strong Victoria, I hardly recognized him!"

"He was still skin and bones when he made it home. It's taken months for him to put the weight back on. It's thanks to you and John he's even here. I can't tell you how much that means to me…to all of us." She wiped back the tears that pooled in her eyes. "I'm sorry, I'm being foolish."

"Nonsense! I still miss Robbie, I know always will. No parent should have to outlive their child."

"Oh, I'm sorry Maddy, here I am burdening you with my fears and I still have my son with me."

"Nonsense, Victoria, a mother's heart is the same the world over."

Nick and Sophie took the time to become reacquainted with each other. Heath picked up the slack for him. Leaving the couple time for hours spent riding and talking. Nick showed her the ranch and taught her to sit a Western saddle. He squired her and her parents to an endless round of dinners and parties thrown in honor of their upcoming marriage. If there were any hurt feelings among the single women of the valley, they were quickly won over by Sophie's honest open charm.

Sitting on the rise near the Barkley graveyard, they looked out over the fields of hay, enjoying one another's company without the need for words. The wind whipped up and the gentle rustle of the grass drifted up to them.

"Did you hear me calling you on the wind Sophie?" She smiled and nodded. "And I you, love."

"Will you miss home too much Soph? We can go back and visit whenever you want." More than anything, Nick wanted her to be happy. He hoped that in time she would come to love the valley as much as he did.

"I'll miss it Nick, but I'd be miserable there without you. And my parents are here now."

"I'm glad they kept Far Coombs. I think the arrangement between the two breeding operations will be good for both."

"I am glad my father kept the farm. Maybe one of our children will want to take it over someday. It was fortunate that my cousin Andrew wanted to take over the running of it."

"Our children. I can just see them Soph, playing in the sun, laughing and happy."

They sat for a while longer.

"You know, you took the sunshine with you when you left."

"Funny, it felt like I left it behind." He bent to kiss her. "But now it's back."

He bent down to kiss her and they lost themselves in each other's passion. "Oh Sophie, I want you so badly. It's a good thing wedding is only two weeks away."

She placed her hand behind his neck and drew him closer, opening her mouth to his caresses and returning them. The wind whipped up around them seeming to grow with their passion. Nick's hand roamed her body, stroking the fires within her to life. The aching in her core was every bit as urgent as the hardness that pressed against her. Nick's hand drifted downward and she tensed.

"Relax love, there are things we can do and still keep our promise to wait." He felt her relax under his weight and she abandoned herself to his touch. The feel of Nick's hands on her skin was like fire as he stroked her breasts and thighs. When he finally came to touch the center of her desire she was beside herself with pleasure. Never had touching herself brought her to this level of naked desire. Nick rubbed his manhood against her leg. Finally he felt her stiffen as her body gave in to his urging and she cried out in ecstasy. He followed with her, great spasms of white hot pleasure coursing through him.

The lay together in each others arms, satisfied but not, wanting nothing more than to be joined completely.

"Two weeks. God woman, you drive me crazy."

The wedding day arrived sunny and cool. It was Autumn, almost a year to the day from when they had parted. Sophie walked down the aisle on her Father's arm, her heart singing. Nick looked to see his bride in an off white gown drawn from the pages of Arthurian legend. From the fitted brocade bodice with its dropped waist and tight sleeves, to the skirt that trailed behind her in graceful folds, she was every bit Guinivere to her cowboy knight.

When their vows were done, Nick lifted the gossamer veil held in place by a simple ringlet of gold and pearls and kissed his wife for the first time. They left the church for the carriage ride back to the ranch and a reception that would be the talk of Stockton and even turn heads on San Francisco. That evening, Heath and Jarrod drove them to town.

Nick carried his Sophie over the threshold of their suite and set her gently on the sofa. Finally alone, the two stood in one another's arms and sighed.  
"I never thought we would get out of there!"

"Me neither. If I didn't know better I'd think your brothers planned all those toasts and speeches just to delay us." She looked up into Nick's hazel eyes and he bent his head until their lips met in a gentle embrace. Nick broke it off.

"What makes you think they didn't?" He bent back down to kiss her. The long months of frustrated desire began to overwhelm them and Sophie finally broke off, breathless with excitement.

"Let me change, darling. Could you help me?" She turned her back to him and felt his shaking hands as they worked the row of pearl buttons that ran the length of her traveling dress. As the fabric parted, inch by inch, Nick kissed the skin that he found hiding beneath. By the time he was done all thoughts of her fine silk negligee were forgotten.

Nick slipped the dress off her shoulders and the let it drop to the floor. He turned Sophie so that he could see her and began to kiss the soft swell of her breasts. She reached up to slip his suit coat off him and then worked the buttons on his shirt. When both garments lay on the floor, she ran her hands across the tanned chest of her husband and began to explore his body. Nick inhaled, savoring the feel of her gentle hands as they caressed him, running through the mat of hair on his chest and over the muscles of his shoulders and arms.

It was all Nick could do to control himself as he unhooked the corset and slipped her camisole over her head. In what would become a ritual for them, a slow seduction that never lost its ability to arouse, they continued undressing one another until both stood naked in the subdued light of the room. Sophie had never seen a man's arousal before and Nick saw the look of surprise and apprehension on her face. Understanding that what he did this night would set the tone for their life as man and wife, he picked her up and gently set her on the bed.

"Sophie, do you trust me not to hurt you?" He searched her face for any doubt.

She looked into his eyes, baring her vulnerability to him and nodded. He bent to kiss her and let his hands begin the slow, sensuous exploration of her body. Throughout that night and all through the languorous days of their honeymoon Nick taught her the secrets of loving and being loved. He rejoiced in her cries of pleasure and shed a tear at the inevitable pain of their first joining. While she would never know sex without deep commitment, in the end he learned how much more the joining of bodies could be when it was done with love in your heart to accompany the fire in your loins.

* * *

_I never made promises lightly  
And there have been some that I've broken  
But I swear in the days still left  
We'll walk in the fields of gold  
We'll walk in the fields of gold_

Nick paced the floor back and forth as Jarrod and Heath tried to calm him and John waited in his own nervous silence. "Brother Nick, you'd think this was your first time!" Jarrod teased him trying to break the tension. Nick rounded on him.

"Dammit Jarrod, I could lose her!"

"I know that Nick, but there's no use in buying trouble, now is there?" Nick looked at his older brother and let out a sigh. The understanding in those blue eyes saddened him. He never wanted to go through what Jarrod had this last year, losing his wife with the birth of their third child Looking at the other men in the room he realized that each of them understood his fear and he counted himself lucky to have their friendship.

"I'm sorry Pappy. I ..."

"No need to apologize Nick. I know how you felt about Andi."

Within minutes, they heard the sharp cry of the final efforts and then the unmistakable squall of a newborn infant. The two brothers smiled and turned their middle sibling towards the stairs.

"Go!"

Within a few minutes Nick entered to find Sophie tired but happy. Nestled at her breast was his daughter, Emma. Nick looked at both of them in wonder as he was introduced to his daughter.

"Oh Soph, you've made me so happy. She's perfect."

"She is, isn't she?"

"Do you want me to send Jarrod or Heath for the boys?"

"Would you mind so much if we waited until this evening? I don't want them seeing me like this."

"Whatever you want, Love." Nick smiled and stroked her hand.

"Why don't you take her down to her uncles and grandpa, while I get cleaned up. I'm sure they're waiting."

"Sure thing." Nick cradled Emma in his arms as Sophie and Victoria looked on. The big gruff cowboy held her like the precious treasure she was. "I love you, Sophie Barkley!"

"John! Thomas, stop picking on your sister!" Nick settled in beside Sophie where she was laying out a picnic lunch. They brought the family here most weekends for some quiet time together. Sometimes it was just them, often Jarrod would join them with his three, and Heath with Cindy and their boy and two girls.

Today it was just them. Emma ran up to throw herself into her father's arms, begging his protection from the brothers she had just been teasing.

"No way little lady, don't hide behind me!" He grabbed her and turned her, tickling under the arms until she dissolved in peals of laughter. The boys tried to join in but Nick was fast enough to catch them as well and soon all three children ran off, seeking escape from their father's delicious torment.

Nick lay down in the lush green grass laughing and closed his eyes. Sophie looked at him, noting the dark circles under his eyes. "You've been working too hard."

"I'm fine honey." She leaned over to kiss him and ran a hand down his chest.

"You're getting skinny too!" He'd dropped a few pounds over the last couple of months.

"It's just the schedule, the ranch and building the addition to your father's house. Once that's done you and I will take a nice long vacation and I'll let you fatten me up." He grinned a cocky grin that told her what his real plans for any vacation they would take included.

She smiled and ran a hand through his hair. "Are you sorry we're moving out of the mansion?"

"We're only moving a mile away, Love. Besides, your father shouldn't be alone in the house. He misses yourmother too much." Maddy had succumbed to influenza the year before, leaving John Winchester lost and lonely. He'd refused to move into the mansion with the rest of the family and wouldn't hear of Nick and Sophie moving in with him just to keep him company. When Audra had announced that she was moving home with her two children while her husband Michael spent two years in Australia, it was the excuse they needed. Nick and his brothers had been busy putting an addition on John's house to give everyone space and the older man some privacy.

"It will be nice having the extra space. Nick, what do you think about adding another room on the second floor, over the summer kitchen?"

"Now wait just a minute Soph, I thought we had settled on the four rooms off the back! What do we need another room for?"

"Well the boys need their room, Emma hers, we'll have the sitting room and then I thought that it would make sense if a door from the sitting room led into the Nursery." She watched him as what she'd said sunk in and his face lit up with a joyous smile. "When?"

"Around Christmas time."

Summer was at its peak and the mountain slopes were covered with in green that shimmered in the sunlight. Gentle breezes stirred the grassy field stretching out below him. Nick sat and took in the view, waiting for his brothers to arrive.

When the house was finished, Heath and Jarrod had taken some extra time to build a surprise for Nick and Sophie. While Nick was away on business for a week in San Francisco, they'd built a gazebo at the couple's favorite spot on the rise near the graveyard. It was a sort of early Anniversary present that had touched Nick and Sophie deeply, and one they had used often over the weeks since its completion. This particular day the children were with their Aunt Audra and their cousins. Sophie had gone for a walk needing time to compose herself so Nick sat alone, looking out over the ranch and contemplating what he had done with the legacy Tom Barkley had left him.

Jarrod and Heath rode up and ground tied their mounts in the shade.

"Bother Nick, we're here as you requested, what is it you wanted to talk to us about?"

They'd waited for Sophie to arrive back and settle in next to him, arms around his waist. It was clear she'd been crying. She was four months pregnant and already showing. Nick looked at Sophie and she nodded. "I don't rightly know how to say this, so I'm just going to be straight about it. You all know I've been losing a lot of weight lately. "

The bothers nodded. It had been the subject of many quiet discussions and a lot of worry. Nick's appetite had disappeared and along with it a lot of his muscular build. "Well, I went to see Doc Merar and it seems like I got stomach cancer. He's giving me another three or four months to live."

Of all the things that Heath and Jarrod had come expecting to hear, this was the last. They sat, stunned at the sheer magnitude of what Nick had said. He was one man but he touched so many lives, how could it be that they would lose him? He was still virile, strong, a man in his middle years with a bright future ahead of him.

Jarrod looked at his brother and wanted to tell him to fight, to come to the city and they would visit every specialist there was until they found an answer. Then he looked in Nick's eyes and saw the truth of it. There would be no miracle cure, no step back from the brink of disaster. The Barkley luck had finally run out for him. He did the only thing left under the circumstances and took the couple in a fierce hug. "We will be there for you Brother Nick, every second of every minute….and after." The tears coursed down his face. He was a man who had buried far too many of the people he loved…both parents, two wives…and now he would do it again.

Heath stood with his back to them, still trying to understand how his life could change so radically in so few words.

"Heath?" Nick broke away from them and went to lay a hand on his best friend's shoulder. "Look at me boy." The face that greeted him was so filled with pain that it stabbed at Nick's heart. "I'm sorry to do this to you, Little Brother."

"You promised we would run this ranch together Nick, until our boys were grown enough to take over. You never broke a promise to me before, Nick." The tears slipped down Heath's face and he leaned his head on the other man's shoulder and wept.

Life on the ranch had all but stopped, everyone shattered by the news when the family had made it public. Duke and Heath, joined by Jarrod, did what was needed and the crew worked with a quiet dedication that made Nick proud. He did his best to oversee the work while he was still able, but the disease and his need to spend time with the family quickly made that impossible.

Sophie and Nick took the children aside when it became obvious that their father was sick and explained to them what was happening. Jarrod cleared his desk of all his work and took no new clients. Audra sent word to Michael and Eugene took leave of his medical practice in St. Louis to return home. There were quiet talks, words said that needed saying before it was too late. Each savored the chance to be able to say goodbye in a way that would leave Nick knowing his place in their heart.

"_Jarrod, Sophie's gonna need you."_

"_You know I'll be there for her Nick. Anything she needs." Jarrod wiped his eyes, he'd lost his ability to hide his feelings in these last few weeks. _

"_Pappy, you're the only one of us who understands what's coming. I…I hate that this is the last favor I'm ever going to ask you. " Jarrod held his brother's shrunken frame and the two of them cried._

"_Heath, watch over the boys for me? They both love the land so much…teach them the things I would have?"_

"_You know you don't need to ask." Heath looked away, but Nick grinned._

"_Don't let Jarrod turn them into lawyers!" _

"_Not a chance of that, besides, seems he's already lured my Danny that way. I guess it's only fitting that his Jim is a much a cowboy as you or me."_

Time at the gazebo became a precious commodity as the end neared. Nick was weak and in agony, needing more and more morphine to blunt the knife edge of the pain that tormented him. Finally, one day in early November he looked at Sophie and they both knew. "Soph, get Jarrod and Heath, for me? Please Hon, I want to see the ranch one last time. The brothers bundled him into the buggy with infinite care, devastated at the wasted body that had once been their brother, a man bigger than life. They drove him out to the gazebo and left the couple to their final goodbyes. It was a beautiful day, with golden sunlight streaming out of a sapphire blue sky. Nick lay in Sophie's arms and listened to the sound of the wind blowing through the golden fields. "Guess we've come full circle, Love."

Nick smiled at her. "Just listen for me in the wind Soph, I'll always be there." She looked around, nodding for Heath and Jarrod to come sit with them and rocked him until his breathing stopped.

* * *

_Many years have passed since those summer days  
Among the fields of barley  
See the children run as the sun goes down  
As you lie in fields of gold  
You'll remember me when the west wind moves  
Upon the fields of barley  
You can tell the sun in his jealous sky  
When we walked in the fields of gold  
_

It was a fine summer's day and the wind whipped across the grassy fields and sent white billowing clouds flying past overhead. Sophie sat in the gazebo the letter in hand.

"Oh Nick, I have a letter here from Thomas. He's settled now at Far Coombs and loves the place. He always was an old soul and now he's in a place that suits him. He's even mentioned the name of a fair young lass, though I hope he waits until he's more settled to give his heart away. John, well Heath has him well in hand and so does that Annie. I'm so glad John married her. You'd love their twins, Nick. They remind me so much of you."

"Emma enjoyed the trip over with Thomas. Audra and Michael will be picking her up and traveling home with her in another month. I never thought I'd miss her so, but it's been too quiet around here without her."

"It's hard to believe Tory is going to turn fourteen soon. Where have the years gone? I wish you'd had a chance to meet her love, or maybe you have. Jarrod swears she's just like you were as a child. He thinks your soul is living in her body."

"I miss you, my love, even after all these years. Hard to believe that a horse buying trip could bring so many changes to so many lives. You've been gone longer than we were together Nick, and I still miss you like the day you left us. I know you wouldn't have wanted me to mourn you forever, but there's just never been anyone since for me. Some people are lucky to find love more than once. Jarrod did, but even he hasn't come to it a third time. I hope you don't mind that he's become a second father to the children and my close friend. It's not love, but it's companionship that keeps away the loneliness."

"Well, it's time for me to get back to the house. Tory and the others will be home from school soon and Heath and John will be back soon for dinner. Jarrod is working from home today. He's been doing that a lot more lately. He's hardly involved in the San Francisco office these days, though Mark is still there. Did I tell you Mark's son Robert had joined the firm?

"Give your mother and my parents my love when you see them."

The wind gusted up out of nowhere and rustled the papers in her hands, whipping the graying hair in strands around her face. She turned to let it blow against her face.

"I love you too Nick Barkley."


End file.
